Yesterday,  was quite a day

Glad – My boy who is 17 and has some SEN, finished his first college course yesterday. It was a very special and amazing day. I never thought I would see him go to college,  so this is quite amazing. The college had a show case at which he performed. His solo and group performance were amazing. I have never been so proud. He worked hard and deserves all the praise he has been given. Its been such a journey,  but that’s for another time. Afterwards he and his two friends went for a wander and I attended his EHCP meeting. It was the best ones I have ever attended.

Sad – (devastated) Before the meeting I got an email telling me that my beautiful friend lost her battled with a brain tumour. She was quite something. I met her whilst playing Farmville back in the day, whilst the world laughing at grown adults racing and rushing to play a silly farm game. Millions were forging life long bonds and friendships.  C. followed my journey raising my son and I watched in awe as she cycled across Asia. In October 2019 she messaged me out of the blue telling me the doctors had given her 6 weeks to live. She had always thought she would meet me, so she invited me to her wedding reception and her gorgeous friend put me up in her ….wait for it…. beautiful Farm House. I was treated so well by all of her friends and it was idyllic. C. truly was a special lady and she defied doctors by almost 2 years. In some ways her passing is a blessing,  she is no longer suffering and her friends and family can start to heal. I am definitely attending her wake and in true blessing style her friend has so kindly offered a room for the night. I am going to miss C. Her energy was beautiful. Rest easy and shine bright my beautiful one. Love you.

    A little bit mad – buzzing and sadness swept through the day. I watched Fast and Furious at the Cinema. My boy watched it with his friends at the other side of the cinema haha. I booked the tickets that way. At home time to relax and reflect. Then, it happened…my boys mentor has been a bit tricky to manage sometimes. Constantly forgetting conversations and so on, it came to the point I had to ask him if he had memory problems. I wanted to understand what the issue was. Well, as you can imagine that went down like a led balloon. His responses were quite disturbing and I felt gas lighted. My dad has dementia and its not uncommon for people to have memory issues if they are stressed or taking certain types of medication. Whichever it was, I wanted to understand it. My character was attacked and my mindfulness was mocked. In the end I had to question why I was paying someone for lessons and being handled as if my thoughts and queries didn’t matte I was told to go and re read my books, I obviously needed a refresher course. Only, mindfulness also means stepping away when the situation is toxic. The good thing is, I know life is about impermanence and every ending brings a new beginning. I had held my opinions and annoyance to myself because he worked so wonderfully with my son. I am proud of myself, I didn’t sink to low blows and I remained pretty much calm. I did cry like a baby, many many tears. 😭 I was finally able to release the tears I had had to hold in when I heard about C. I held a felt bear in my hand that she had made for me. Eventually, I called one of my besties Snoopy B. She listened beautifully as I ranted, fought back tears and cried and grieved. A true blessing.

    Today was a good day. I achieved a lot and as I was in town shopping for bits, I showed Champus Fran around town and the shops via photos on WhatsApp. We had a coffee in her garden and appreciated our friendship. Tomorrow is another friendship filled day. Until next time, stay happy and inspired. X